Tuesday, July 15, 2008

SALVATION TESTIMONY

Recently I was asked about my salvation testimony. It brought back such memories, as I recounted the emotions and steps that led up to it. Once again, I thanked the Lord for people, He placed in my path, to bring me to salvation. There were so many people the Lord used to help me find the right way, but the one that I am most indebted to, is my precious father-in-law. He loved me unconditionally, even during the times I was most unlovely - those rocky, rebellious, teenage years. He made up his mind he was going to love me, no matter what, and that's what he did. Then he never got rid of me! LOL I loved him as much as my own flesh and blood.
My testimony of salvation can get a bit lengthy, but I'll try to shorten it. LOL I made a false profession at 12 yrs old. I carried that w/ me until I married the preacher's son, at 18! We were married 6 months and I was expecting our first baby. We had been showing the "Thief in the night" videos to our teen group (I see them now, and I wonder what we were thinking! YIKES at the 70's clothing in it! LOL) Anyway, they were instrumental in MY salvation. They made me begin to do a little self examination. All of a sudden I became troubled about the after life and preoccupied with the rapture. I began to worry that I might be left behind for some reason. I tried to go back in my mind and remember what had happened the night I made that profession at 12. I was at a huge crusade that was taking place in our local high school. When the invitation was given, I went forward because my friend urged me to, not because the Holy Spirit was convicting me of any sin. So consequently, it really meant nothing to me. It was all perfunctory.
But I hung onto that as my salvation experience for years. Now all of a sudden, 7 years later, married to the preacher's son, and pregnant, I couldn't remember what had happened that night. What did the preacher preach on? What verses of Scripture were shown to me? Did I pray? If so, what did I say? I couldn't remember any of it. That really bothered me. I began to get worried. But what do I do now? I married the preacher's son. I teach Sunday school. I work on a bus. I help in the nursery. EVERYBODY thinks I'm already a Christian! One day when I was at my in-laws house, my precious father-in-law (who is now in Heaven) said to me, "Chub (that was his nickname for me LOL) the best thing you can do for yourself and for that little baby you are carrying, is to keep your heart right with the Lord." Then he showed me I Timothy 2:15 Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
I didn't fully understand what that verse meant, but began to wonder, if I wasn't right with God, does that mean that the Lord might judge me somehow through this pregnancy or birth? That weighed heavy on my heart. Fear and pride just continued to hold me back from saying anything. Then one hot July day, I had been at my mother's house doing laundry. I was big as a house with the baby. I came home, expecting to see my husband, home from work. But instead, what I saw, scared the daylights out of me. I walked into the house, calling for him, only to get no response. What I saw, were his clothes - pants draped on the side of the bed, socks in a pile, by the legs of the pants, and his shirt crumpled, on the bed. My first immediate thought was HE'S GONE! The rapture has happened, and I've been left behind! I got on the phone right away, to call my father in law, to see if they knew where he was. No answer! I was mortified! Later I found out that he had gone swimming with his little brothers. That night, I couldn't sleep. My emotions were through the roof. My husband was sound asleep, and I just sat there in bed, in the dark, staring out the window. Wondering, if I'm saved, then why am I so worried about the Lord's return? That event should be exciting to a believer. I argued with the Lord for hours, it seemed. Finally, it was almost as if I heard a voice - "It's now or never! If you don't take care of this tonight, you never will." I had to swallow my pride once and for all, and get it settled. In sobs, I woke my husband. His first thought was, that it had to do with the baby. But when I finally got him to understand it was my eternal soul hanging in the balance, he jumped out of bed, and we went to the living room of our little apartment, knelt by the couch, and there I TRULY repented of my sins, and asked the Lord to save me. I've never doubted it since. I still mess up, who doesn't? What a joy to pillow my head at night though, and know without a doubt that when I die, I will go to Heaven. I don't know what people do without the Lord. He gives me such peace.

*As an added note* When I delivered our first baby (our son), I had preeclampsia. To force delivery, I was admitted to the hospital 3 weeks early. I had been induced all night with Pitocin, to no avail, no labor pains had begun. My hubby, who had been by my side all night, stepped out of the room to get coffee, and get washed up. Moments later, I hemorrhaged badly, and was rushed in for an emergency C-section. We lived 30 miles from the hospital. They told me later, that had I been at home and that would have happened, I could have lost the baby or died myself. My mind went back immediately to I Timothy 2:15.....

11 comments:

Terri said...

Starr, this was a real blessing to read, and I have something for you on my blog:

http://graceandsalt.blogspot.com/2008/07/im-humbled.html

Tori said...

What a blessing to see how God saved you. It always amazes me to see the things God does in peoples lives to bring them to salvation. Amen, He sure is good!

I just found your blog and I think I'll link to ya!

Sarah Joy said...

You're testimony warms my heart because I was saved after watching those movies too! I was only seven, but I know exactly what you are talking about. I had a come-into-an-empty-house moment of terror also.

I tagged you for a meme, if you want to do it!

Marilyn said...

I can't believe how VERY similar our salvation experiences are! It's so wonderful to KNOW now that I'm saved instead of having that constant nagging dread and fear and doubt.
Thanks for sharing.

Marilyn in MS

Mrs.Vicki said...

Thank you for visiting my blog.
The first time I saw those films I was 11 years old and went forward in church. After my second daughter was born I realized I needed a relationship with Christ, but not from fear. I don't know if I was really saved at 11 or at 25 but I have the peace that passes all understanding know. I see you live real close to us, we live in Charlotte and attend Calvary Baptist.

Julie Fink said...

It's ALWAYS good to hear about how people get saved. What a special testimony you have.

abrightnewdawn said...

AHHHHH!!! I JUST FOUND YOU!!! And totally by accident, too! I was going to call you this week! Not kidding, either! How cool. Well, AMEN to your testimony, I'm just so excited that I found you!! I'll email you or call you soon. I'm assuming you're listed. :)

Starr said...

Well HI DAWN! So nice to hear from you! I think about you often and wonder how you're doing. I'm just heading out the door for Summer camp this week. So if you don't reach me for several days - that is the reason. I'll look for you when I get back.

Starr said...

Oh and PS Sarah - I don't know what a "meme" is. Is that something I'm supposed to pass on to somebody else?
Sorry - I'm still kind of new to the blog world.

Sarah Joy said...

Starr, sorry I forgot to come back! A meme, should you wish to accept it, is like a chain letter in the bloggy world. You'll find the instructions on my blog several posts back. You do the silly things therein, and then pass it on to as many other people with blogs as it says to. It's nice to go to their blog and let them know they've been tagged. It's a way to generate more traffic to other people's blogs, since people will go check out the links. Some people do the meme and just say anyone can participate if they want to and just let me know if you do. Others flagrantly break the rules, which is perfectly fine, if you don't want to go through all the trouble of posting links. I also know a few people who very rarely participate in memes because they just don't have time. That's ok too.

Julie's Jottings said...

What a blessing for me to read this! Amen!!